Monday, June 29, 2015
I once had a fake BJJ black belt start up a school in my town. He literally took my marketing as his own and then started to wreck my reputation around town for no reason. He invited a high level black belt to his school (very famous) and the high level black belt took him on as an affiliate!
The worst thing he did was promote unsuspecting white belt students to blue belts. He was finally outed by the internet community. How do you think his students felt? Hurt? Betrayed? Are they really blue belts? How would you feel?
The amazing part is this guy had a long history of doing these sorts of things before this. His girlfriend called me, out of the blue, crying one day. She finally saw through all the lies and was distraught. We had a heartfelt two hour talk about all the bull he told her, including the story that he was a legit bjj black belt and he told her that for a time he had played "the Stig" on Top Gear! Can you believe that? He has probably moved on and is misrepresenting himself right now in some other industry. I'd bet on it.
What's worse is he also convinced another guy to put a black belt on and tell everyone this fake instructor promoted him to black even though the fake instructor had no stripes. This new guy had the balls to pretend he was actually a black belt at tournaments until one of my purple belts tapped him out at a super match we set up. It then became abundantly clear that he was in no way a black belt. The mats don't lie.
People who pretend to be something they are not are sociopaths and compulsive liars. This is why I'm unapologetic about my words and have no sympathy for these guys. It amazes me that so many people on social media don't think the fake black belts should be humiliated for lying. These people simply go through life "feeling" and not "thinking." These naive people appear to lack critical thinking skills and just want to reflexively hug these wolves because these guys have problems. It's always, "You shouldn't humiliate him like that," until it happens to them then the huggers get a real dose of reality and the anger and hurt that follows. It's called being victimized.
The hugger's words humiliate the true victims in this story, the white belts who he promoted to blue and the high level black belt he conned into affiliation with. Fake black belts are no different then the two escaped convicts from the New York prison in personality traits, they lie and manipulate to get what they want and sometimes wreck lives. They just haven't killed anyone..or have they? Who knows the truth. You can never get to it.
To end, I would like to say it took me 13 years of very hard work and dedication to earn my BJJ black belt. I'll be damned if I'm going allow someone to get it in 30 seconds! Public humiliation is not too great a punishment in my eyes. People need to know as to be on the look out for these charlatans!
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Thursday, June 11, 2015
I am thoroughly convinced that Jiu-Jitsu wants you to quit. I often tell this to students at the end of my seminars. Many of them sit and nod their heads in agreement at knowing that feeling. If this weren’t true then why do so many people quit either at the beginning or somewhere in the midst of their Jiu-Jitsu journey?
If Jiu-Jitsu were really an actual person I think that it would try to make a student prove that they deserve to be in Jiu-Jitsu on a continual basis. It would take pleasure in beating that student’s ego down until he or she fundamentally changed as a person or quit Jiu-Jitsu to do some other activity. Being squashed on the bottom of a brown belts side control as a white or blue belt is a feeling that very few people can handle let alone enjoy. They know full well that it’s practically impossible to escape and soon, very soon they are going to get submitted for the 9th time in that 8 minute training match. They are then supposed to come back the next night with an attitude of “boy, getting my ass kicked sure is a lot of fun?”
It’s no wonder that after numerous nights of the same old result a little excuse like being tired and watching tv or a big excuse like hanging out with the spouse and kids comes along and takes hold and the practitioner decides not to come to class. They act like they deserve the night off from Jiu-Jitsu. Another excuse happens the next day and so on and so forth. Then after a few weeks of not showing up the excuse of, “Well I need to get into better shape before I come back to class starts to take hold.” See, it wants you to quit. Jiu-Jitsu only wants the worthy ones. The ones who want to get better no matter the hardship.
Ok Jiu-jitsu is not a person and it really doesn’t want you to quit, in fact it doesn’t even really care if you stick or not so that leaves only one person responsible for your quitting, You. Are you in or out? What is your commitment level? Is your goal really black belt? If it is, be prepared for a long tough haul. It’s part of life and you need to accept it and be prepared for it no matter how you feel at this moment.
Times will not always be easy; you need to admit that to yourself. You will have tough times that you will find yourself ill prepared for, that you were not expecting. You will need to harden yourself to these trying times. Can you deal with the pain? Can you deal with loss? Can you deal with the injuries? Can you handle the doubt? Can you deal with the time it takes to get a black belt? Can you deal with the personalities? Jiu-Jitsu reveals who you are as person and sometimes you won’t like what you see.
This is a direct result of your character and who you are as a person. Don’t rely on your instructor to motivate you. Don’t dwell on the fact that maybe right at this moment training isn’t as fun as it once was, because at some time or another it won’t be as fun as it was when you first started. Remember showing up is 90% of getting a black belt. It’s the battle that is so easily lost. Will you be a casualty? Don’t let Jiu-Jitsu tap you out.
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